Who Is Responsible For The Action Of The Youths?

The youths of Bermuda have taken a hard hit over the recent pass and this is so because they have been doing what each of us has done in the pass, while growing up: they made some poor decision. While I resided in St. Vincent and the Grenadines: the land of my birth; without the prompting of anyone I took on the role of mentor many of the nation’s youths. I in several programs, more spacific: in a once a week program that was geared to provide activities for the youths of my neighborhood, this was done in order to provide these young people with an alternative to the negitive cycle (Both parental and community) they were expected to repeat.

Some Of The Hikers Taking A Rest On The Trail To St. Andrews Mountain

I presented to the youths of my neighborhood, a different way of living; The Adventurers Hiking program which attracted youths from all over the country was geared to provide the opportunity for young people to explore their adventurous side by participating in daring events in a controled environment and the Read and Have Fun a program that was instrumental in highlighting the importance of reading and was responsible in inspiring an interest in none reading children in reading. This program was also designed by me and was sponsored by the Vin-save Child Development Center, which was and still is under the Direction of Mrs. Janice Fraser, who was integrally involved in the program.

From my interaction with Bermuda’s Youths I can say that they are no different from the youths in other parts of the world. Like other youths they get involved in petty squabble that get out of hand from time to time, they also have tons of energy that is focus in the wrong direction, there is also the existence of rage and the feeling of invincibility, when these characteristics are properly directed, they can be converted into a productive force and be beneficial to the individual but is left unchecked and poorly directed, such can yield dangerous results.

Here is where the problem begins. The young person is very often unable to properly direct or redirect the surplus of energy, rage or utilize the spirit of invincibility that are common to this demographic of the society and the there is rarely anyone present who can and are willing to dedicate the time and knowledge to help the youths channel their energies and rage in to activities that can allow them to relief themselves of such in a control and productive manner; hence the reason for the problems.

PCs Ward, Hilton And Palmer With Their Littles.
My religious affiliation and my association with the Big Brother Big Sister of Bermuda have given me the opportunity to mentor many of Bermuda’s youths, a responsibility that I took seriously and one that I handled tenderly.


My First Little Brother: Donte and I at the South Side Bowl

I was connected to Donte by the Big Brother program a wonderful young man that has potential that cannot be measured; Donte is a shy young man who I expect a lot of. With the correct motivation and support there is nothing that he cannot accomplished, We enjoy many games of lawn tennis, when this awesome young man is excited he has such a loud infectious laugh that is a delight to hear.

Taj after exploring a cave in the Blue Hole Hill Area

Later I was given the opportunity by the Big Brother Big Sister to mentor another little. My new mentee’s name was Taj. Taj is a very talkative youngster, which was a sign that he possess an active, curious and inquiring mind. As such, his curiosity leads him to asked many probing questions, a quality that most people will find annoying but a quality that should be encourage and properly directed. If this young man is not discouraged from exercising and expanding his curiosity but encouraged to asked question and is taught how to satisfy such curiosity; by teaching him how to search for such answers; then is no telling what this young man can accomplish.

There is Javan: an intense, high energy and honest youth, who has an extraordinary capacity to love, even for one of so tender an age; he knows how to show appreciate. This young man is a delight to be around. With the correct mentoring, parental guidance and the correct peers Javan will excel in any field.

There are many of Bermuda’s youths that I have grown close to and have grown to love that are not mentioned here. However, the biggest problem with my mentees and every youth are; they are misunderstood. Adults are often not patience enough or they are not willing to dedicate the time needed to allow children to be children. The adult population (parent, teachers, mentors, guardians) must understand that members of this demographic are not adults and they should not expect the youths/children to behave, interact, and grasp concepts and instruction as adults do, for the simple fact they are not adults.

The fact that each adult were once a youth should afford us the understanding of what the youths are going through and thus make us the best parent, guardian and mentors; however, our impatience has made us a danger to our young people. We need to reform our mentality and lifestyle in such a manner that will allow us to be better, more responsible and active mentors, parents and guardian. It is only when we understand that to be a parent or to be given the opportunity to impact or influence the future of a child, or young person; is the most secret responsibility there is; it is then, we will reorganized our priorities and ensure that our children are placed at the top of the list.

We cannot blame the youths for their mal behavior for they are a product of their parents and to a wider extent the community. For the level and the quality of parenting each parent give to their children will in fact determine the quality of the young people and by a larger extent the quality of citizen the community is blessed or cursed with. In turn the parent will give to the community the type of citizen the community demands.

The question what type of citizen is the community demanding from its parents?

Who Is To Be Blamed For The Delinquency Of Our Children?

.........Who is to be blame for the delinquency of our children?

Proverbs 6:22 states “Train up a child in the way that he should go; and when he is old he will not depart from it. Embedded in this statement is the weight of the responsibility parents are expected to bear. What are the words of Jehovah God actually saying in this scripture text? It is important that we examine this text carefully and pay attention to a particular key word in this text. The basic information that is transmitted in this text is clear; however we need to examine the key word that can change the meaning of the text.

The key word in this text is “will.” Will is definite; there is no uncertainty in will. If there were a chance that after we have train our children as Jehovah expected and prescribed they would go astray; then the all knowing, all powerful, omnipresence Jehovah would have replace the word will with may. Jehovah cannot lie and keep his supreme Godly status. If we train the child or children correctly they will not depart from the training when he, she or they reaches adulthood.

The best illustration there is to provide a practical explanation of this is as follows: When Jehovah blesses us with a child, that child’s mind can be compared to that of a pure empty piece of sponge. The parents are responsible for everything that sponge observes. It is therefore the parent responsibility to ensure that the sponge becomes saturated with only pure, wholesome, uplifting materials. They should also have knowledge of any negative that is observed into that sponge so they can take the necessary steps to limit the impact of such contaminate.

Now if you if that sponge is left unattended and a stranger comes by and take your clean pure sponge and puke on that it. Who is to be blame for contaminating the sponge? And let us say once again, you neglect to pay attention to that which you are responsible for, and one of you jealous friend come by and urinate on your sponge and another defecate on your sponge. Now, who is responsible for the contamination of your sponge? Yes you are. It is as a result of your neglect and incompetence that resulted in such contamination.

In some cases, even though the sponge looks normal, whenever that sponge is squeezed it will results the emission of impurities. It is the same with a child. When through our neglect and laziness we creates (left alone with horrible people) an environment that allow negative influences to infiltrate the psyche of our children which eventually resulted in delinquent, antisocial and unacceptable behaviors. Who are to be blame?

Today’s parents are quick to take credit for the positive accomplishment of their children yet they disassociate themselves from their negatives and rebellious behaviors. It is a fact that each of us want to be associated with positive or good things; as truthful as that may be, we are not to deceitfully cast the blame for our parental short comings on others especially the victims.

The greatest gift and the most awesome responsibility an individual can take on is that of being a parent. However we dedicate more quality time to ensuring we are successful in our professional endeavors, the management of our finances and other assets than we put into the nurturing of our children: the most precious of all the valuables we will ever be responsible for.

In the same manner Jehovah entrusted us with wealth, our life and time etc. He also entrust us and make us custodian of the children he place in our care. Even more important than the money we are asked to manage for Jehovah, is the care of our children: the most priceless and precious gifts we will ever get. In the scriptures we are asked to return a faithful tithe and free will offering which, we willingly do with a level of seriousness, commitment and loyalty. Yet the nurturing and the protection of the children that are in our care are not treated with the same level of seriousness, commitment and loyalty.

We do not give any and every person access to our money; we do not lend our money to irresponsible people, we do not invest in companies unless we have perform due diligence, we do not give gifts to people who do not deserve such; we do not allow just anyone into our home and cars. In short we take very good care to ensure our assets are secure and properly utilized. Yet we expose and entrust our children to people of all strange beliefs, concepts, morality, training and behaviors. We secure our monies in gigantic impregnable fortresses but we entrust and leave our children in the destructive hands of pedophiles, rapist, homosexuals, thieves etc. who intentionally imposes themselves (rape) and their corrupt values (persuade them to do things that is against your and your children moral and belief) on our children.

Marriage and parenthood is not a responsibility we should get into without first going through some critical self examination, setting goals, and developing the will and habit to ensure that the family objectives are accomplished. It is also important that potential parents asked Jehovah for wisdom to make decisions, set goals, and take actions that will aid us to accomplish the goals.

As parents we are responsible to ensure that our children are protected, provided for, taught how to be responsible and in turn become good husband or wife and good parents. We must exhort such influence that our children are protected even in our absence: we owe that much to our children.

In the same way we will be called upon to give an account to Jehovah for our action, and our custodian of the thing our Creator has entrusted us with, we will be called upon to give an account to Jehovah for the children he has entrust us with. Fortunately for you, Jehovah knows every instant of neglect and parental hypocrisy and the impact such had on the child and the outcome of the child.

It is also important to note that parental hypocrisy is the most dangerous exemplified behavior a parent can give to his child or children. You may notice that I used the word give. Yes that is what we actually do to our child or children when we teach them with our life and the way we life and the life we live is a total contradiction to the life we expect our children to live. Remember action still speak louder then words; and example is still the greatest teacher. Can you explain how the cliché a picture is worth a thousand words applies in this case?

Is It Possible To Be Honest In Today's Society?

To be an honest individual in today’s world is a tough but not impossible task. It is tough because of the mentality of the people who inhabits the world. Today’s world is made up of to many dysfunctional people, who were born of dysfunctional families that occupy very responsible position within the community.

Today we are faced with individuals who are products of negative cycles. The world is literally filled with teenager who have prematurely dived, were forced, or accidentally stumbled into parenthood. A critical stage of life they are not ready or were prepared for.

Such is not only a shock for the young person but it can be considered a rude awakening. An awakening to a world of responsibility they did not know existed, a world where they are forced to become provider, protector and nurturer when they are not mentally professionally, academically or otherwise equipped to do either of these things that was trusted onto them.

Then we have many unscrupulous men and women in the society who for many reason, are incapable to govern their desires especially their sexual desires; and as a result of their lack of control they pray on the helpless children in our community. Forever corrupting their mind by imposing and violating their most precious and covered part of them: their sexuality. Many of our children are sexually violated and in turn their lives are destroyed. They doom these children to lives of homosexuality, prostitution, violence, and various insecurities.

And then there are the parents who are just poor parents. They fail to (not because they do not know better but because they could not care) take the time and give back to their children what their parents did and give to them. For these people their child or children are viewed as obstacle that keeps them from moving forward, having fun and doing what ever they want to do no matter how trivial their hearts desires are.

Today, we are confronted with dysfunctional men and women that came up in dysfunctional homes, were taught by dysfunctional parents etc. now these people are involved in society, they holds key position and they are expected to uphold the moral, set standard, mold young minds, shape policies, enact laws, set standards, uphold ethics, and live a life that is an example to the other members of the society.

Here lie the beginning of the problems our society are confronted with; you can see the uphill task that we are faced with in today’s society. We expect children who were not taught how to live and be good citizens, parents, and employee to enter into society and function as normal. In most cases they were never taught how to be patient, how to go without, how to endure conditions and circumstances that will build character.

Here our children are called upon to performed function and get involved in activities that should be administered onto them. They are asked to teach their children lessons that they themselves were not taught. It is like picking up an individual with first grade mathematics knowledge and putting them into a school to teach the subject and expect the students to get passing grades.
In closing I am forced to ask these big questions which are: is it possible and how can we get back to our roots?

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  How do we correct all the wrongs and the evils that were inflicted on the victims?
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  Heal all the hurts?
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  Mend all the broken hearts?
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  Bring the hearts towards home?

Could we ever recreate the kind of society that is free from the hurt that corrupt our community?

We have seen grown, responsible, educated individuals who have failed to live up to their expectation and realized their true potential. For a moment of pleasure and the little indiscretions, which have resulted in the propagating of the wrong messages; they set the wrong examples for those looking on in hope, of learning some of life important lessons.

My New Found Heroes

My new found Heroes

On Wednesday 30th April 2008, I was invited to a sport meet which was being hosted by the Dame Marjorie Bean Hope Academy at the National Stadium. The little crowd of spectators and participant that gather there were a testament of dedication.

The teachers, family members and friends of the students and friends of the academy all represented a strong symbol of love and dedication to the children all of whom suffer from a form of mental and physical disability or impairment of some kind.

Some of the children are unable to do anything for themselves and are thus totally reliant on their parents to do everything for them, activities which ranges from feeding to cleaning their children. I cannot say for sure but, I can imagine that these relationships can be stressful on all of the parties involved.

But what struck and touched me most, was the level of love and commitment these parents show to their children and the level of pride that was displayed not when their children won an event (because it was not about winning or losing) but when they displayed an effort to accomplish the given event. If I was to make a judgment based on the pride I saw in the eyes of the fathers, the mothers, the well-wishers and the staff of the Dame Marjorie Bean Hope Academy for the student’s efforts, I would have thought that these were normal children. But such is the results of love. This was a perfect representation of the saying love knows no boundary.

I always thought that I was/am a good father, but to see these parents in action, through the complexity of the challenges they face with daily. These and the way they care for their children made me rethink my position of being a good father. Anyone can be a mother or a father to a normaland or healthy child but it takes a special renovation in character to be a dedicated parent to one of these child/children. I guess that is Why God is God and need no help being God. He entrusted these children to parents with such impeccable character that it matters not the limitation of the children, they are assured that they will be loved as if he or she had no limitation.

I tip my hat to you all, the parents, friends, and relatives of the students and the staff of the Dame Marjorie Bean Hope Academy, you have put me to shame, you all have thought me some new and vital lessons of life, but most of all you have shown me the new level to which I must attain.

I must say I had fun at the sports meet, I cheered, I competed (yes I was beaten by some of the kids) and I helped in what ever way I could. But what I would have really liked to have done was to enter the hearts and mind of the parents. I do not have any heroes but my experience at that sport meet has given me some. My heroes are the men and women who parent these children, Why; because they show joy in the middle of their difficulty, they show courage even when they should have been broken, and most of all they stand up and take on the type of responsibility that most people will run away from.

A true Story (lol)

My son-Malique

Take a little time out of your busy schedule; pull up a chair and read the account of this true story, this story actually happened on a beach in St. Vincent and the Grenadines. This is one of the four short stories that make up a book that is soon to be published. I hope you enjoy reading this story as much as I enjoy writing and bringing it to you. Although some of you may conclude that my action was not responsible, it has already happened and there is nothing I can do about it now.

I think that larger-than-life Saga that unfolded after Sam Strangeway publish her first front page story about me in the Royal Gazette; the story that sparked the beginning of my troubles, in the Bermuda Police Service and eventually lead to my suspension will be published in this book also. The total sage will be my next big project.

The Obedient Son
By

Allan H. F Palmer

Michael was Malique’s father. To Malique his daddy meant the world to him, and Michael treated Malique as if he was the world. The father and son loved each other very much. Malique had just celebrated his sixth birthday. The duo love spending quality time with each other. Sometimes the two would disappear for hours. They often went hiking, where together they basked in and experienced the wonders and the beauty of nature. The pair love frequenting the local airport there; there they would look at the ’planes take off and land. The Botanical Garden was also on their list of favorite places to visit. At the botanical garden they would enjoy the beauty of the flowers, roll on the grass, and participate in all the activities children enjoy. There were also the beaches; Malique love the beach. At the beach the father and son pair would frolic for hours, and sometimes they just went into the nearby town where they walked around and observed the activities of the town’s people. They learnt many things and they had fun together.

It was a beautiful sunny Sunday morning; it seemed as if the sun shone brighter than normal. It was a perfect day to go to the beach. Sunday was always a special day for Michael and Malique; it was the day of the week that Malique looked forward to most, with curious anticipation. Sunday was also the day the enthusiastic young man got to spend all day with his father. The two always engaged in lots of fun activities. Malique was sure that his dad had some wonderful adventure planed for the day. After breakfast Malique noticed that his daddy was cleaning the car. The energetic child decided to join his father in the task of preparing the car for the day’s activities. Although Malique was of little use in the task at hand the loving father was happy just to have his son around, even when he got in the way.

“Daddy, what are we going to do today?” asked Malique as he looked at his dad with searching eyes. To the lad it mattered not what activity his father chose; what was important was that he got to be with his dad.

“We will be going to the beach,” his father replied.

Immediately a twinkle of excitement appeared in Malique’s eyes. He ran into the house and to his mother, and with a blaze of enthusiasm he shouted, “Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, Daddy is going to take me to the beach, can you help me get ready?” His mother was only too happy to help her dear son get ready for his adventure.

With all the commotion the young boy was making you would have thought that the beach was the most wonderful place in the entire world. The beach was two miles away.

Indian Bay was a small white-sand beach; it was just about 250 meters long. There was not much room for playing, for there was a retaining wall one-meter high with a one-and-a-half meters security wire fence erected at the top of the wall. This structure was designed to keep picnickers off the private property that bordered the beach. About 20 meters from the shore there were two small islands that acted as a shelter for the beach. Immediately in front of the beach was the smaller of the two islands; this island had a few trees growing on it and there was also a humongous white cross erected in its center. Hence the name Cross Island. Cross Island rose about five meters above the level of the sea. This Island acted as a little challenge for people who had just learned how to swim; to swim to and from Cross Island was quite an accomplishment.

On the north of Cross Island were the second and the larger of the two Islands. This island was called High Rock. High Rock was about 40 meters from the shore. It was a very large, barren, and dense volcanic rock that had many ridges and cracks. High Rock stood about thirty meters above the level of the sea. To swim and climb to the top of High Rock was an experience, but the challenge was to jump and plummet into a free-fall landing into the deep blue sea that spread out like a carpet below.

Finally it was time to leave for the beach. The duo got into the car and off they went. The beach was half an hour away. Michael was as excited as his son. He anticipated having tons of fun at the beach with his son. It was Michael’s plan to start Malique’s swimming lessons when they got to the beach.

At the beach the father and son team had tons of fun; they frolicked and swam, they built sand castles or what they called sand castles, which was washed away by the wave that regularly bathe the shore and in whose part they were errected. Malique had his swimming lesson. All of the activities wore out the young child; he was tired. Malique’s daddy saw an opportunity to go for a little swim on his own.

Malique was sitting on a stone; he was exhausted but excitement still gleamed from his eyes. Michael walked up too and spoke to the tired child.

“Malique,” he said, “I am going for a swim. I want you to sit on this rock. I don’t want you to move, no matter what happens. Do you understand?”

“Yes, daddy,” the shivering child said.

Michael knew that Malique could not swim, and if he ventured into the water unsupervised he could drown. That would be a tragedy. The death of a child is one tragedy no loving parent would like to have in his or her family. Michael had to make sure that his son understood him before he ventured out for his swim.

Malique sat on the stone and watched as his father swam back and forth. Malique wanted to join his dad in the water but he was too tired to join in the fun. Michael swam to Cross Island and back, and Malique made no attempt to leave his very comfortable seat on the rock.

All appeared well. Michael decided to take a swim out to the High Rock and climb to the top of the rock. He jumped from the top of the rock into the clear blue water below. He did this several times. This activity was very exhausting. Finally Michael Malique’s dad climbed to the top of High Rock and took a seat to rest. From his position on the top of the island Michael had a clear view of his son sitting comfortably and undisturbed on the stone. Malique could also see his daddy from his seat. Malique hoped for the day when he could join his father on the top of High Rock.

While on the top of the High Rock, Michael noticed that something strange was happening on the beach. He noticed that everyone was running to and fro, but eventually everyone ran into the water. Screams could be heard coming from the beach; Michael searched the beach with worried eyes and as wondered what could be happening. The concerned father’s heart pounded with fear; he feared for the safety of his beloved son. Michael knew there was danger on the beach but he was unaware of what the danger was.

Michael looked at his son and noticed him still sitting on the rock looking in the direction of the people as they ran and screamed. Michael was tempted to jump off of the large rock, but he still did not know what the danger was. It would have taken Michael about three minutes at the least to get to his son. To Michael the swim seemed as if it would last an eternity.

Just then Michael saw a large vicious-looking rottweiler running along the beach. Now the powerful, angry and ferocious bark of the dog could be heard, and there was a man running frantically behind the dog with an unattached leash in his hand. Now, there were only two people on the shore: they were the man with the leash in his hand and Malique. Michael saw the dog ran toward the helpless little boy. As a result Michael felt a large lump in his throat, that made him feel as it he was suffocating. Micheal was not suffocating but he was petrified by the thought of what could probable happen.

The helpless father's heart pounded harder and faster than ever before. Although no harm has come to the child as yet; he blamed himself for anything that might happen to his defenseless son. He was helpless and a sense of hopelessness overtook him. If he was there, using his bare hands Malique’s dad would have ripped that vicious dog to shreds to protect his son, but there was nothing that he could do from where he was. There was nothing Malique could do, there was nowhere for the frightened child to run. If he ran into the sea he would drown, since he could not swim, and if he followed the last instruction his father had given him he would be mauled by the vicious dog. It was a hopeless situation. Malique’s dad knew that rottweiler and children were not a good combination, as this breed of dog is known to be very aggressive toward children.

Just then Malique’s dad said, “Lord Jesus, you are the only one who can protect my son. Please keep him safe.” Malique’s dad never once took his eyes off the events that were unfolding on the beach, even when he uttered the prayer for his son’s protection.

The vicious dog ran faster and faster toward the child and as he got closer to the unattended child, who was still sitting on the rock, the frightening growl of the angry dog could be heard. The people in the sea watched with horror as the ferocious dog approached the helpless child. When the fierce dog got close enough to launch an attack, he stopped, looked at the child, smelt him, then turned away and went toward the sea and continued to bark at the people in the sea.

Malique’s dad breathed a sigh of relief and dived from the top of High Rock with his Outstretched and pointing down at the sea. The anxious father hands made contact with the sea water first, then his head, shoulder then his whole body was swiftly submerged into the deep blue see. Micheal hurriedly swam to the shore, dispensing every bit of energy he had in the effort. When the anxious Father got to the shore the dog had already been put back on his leash and was removed from the beach. The thankful father ran to his son, who was still sitting on the rock as if nothing had happened.

“Are you Okay, Malique?” the nervous father was trying his best to reflect the level calm his brave and obedient son now exhibited

“Yes daddy,” the child answered, with a sense of calm in his voice that was seen on his face and that which his demeanor now reflected.

“Were you afraid of the dog?” Michael calmly asked.

“Yes daddy” Malique replied.

“Why didn’t you run like every one else?” the father asked, anxious to hear his son’s answer.

From the way Malique looked at his father, you could have tell the lad was puzzeled by the question “Daddy, you told me not to move from here no matter what happened,” the lad replied with a naïve childish innocence.

Michael held his obedient son close to his heart and squeezed him. Under his breath he said thank you Jesus. He knew that the dog had been redirected from his son by the mighty hand Jesus.